Kindness

Flower from my Mom's yard

I have been thinking allot about what it means to be kind.  I have never really questioned whether I was a kind person. I always have had empathy for those who were less fortunate than myself and I hurt with and for those who don't know Jesus.  But Brian said something the other day...Jesus said to love your neighbor as yourself and that means that first and foremost you are loving yourself.  Today I read this blog post and she made the same observation.

This is something that I have always struggled with,  I like myself and I am proud of myself but I expect way too much out of me.  I expect that I will have a perfect house and that I will be a loyal and dedicated friend to all of my friends that I will be the best at my job and my family will only eat the healthiest foods.  And that list is just a few of the things that I expect from myself on a DAILY basis.   So lately I am trying to be kinder to myself because I want my daughter to learn to treat herself with kindness. I am going to cut myself a few breaks.  Its ok, that I am not my skinniest right now,  my body has been through allot with Infertility and pregnancy.  I will do my best to be attractive and put together but its ok that I don't wake up at 4:00 am and workout for a hour. I will be proud when I manage to squeeze in 30 mins of yoga.  I went grocery shopping this week and I bought some frozen meals.  I tried to make good choices in the meals I chose but they are still overly processed and not the best for our health, however its better than eating chik fil a twice a day and its kinder and easier on me as I find a new balance with being a Mama and a Recruiter all in the same day. Some friendships have stalled, instead of beating myself up b/c I have lost touch I am forgiving myself for only being able to do so much right now, I pray that the kindness I am showing myself will carry over into those relationships and one day things will be back to normal.

I don't know why I felt the need to put this out there right now but it feels good to be honest and kind!

The ultimate lesson all of us have to learn is unconditional love, which includes not only others but ourselves as well.

- Elizabeth Kubler-Ross